Naina's Decision
by SargentMom573
Summary: In Kal Ho Na Ho, I didn't much care how Naina was portrayed as a wet rag whenever Aman came around. My version of how things would have worked out if Naina just had a backbone.


Kal Ho Naa Ho

(Tomorrow might not come)

Scene 1

Just as Naina was thinking that telling someone you love them was harder than she had thought it would be, her eyes fell on a picture, partially under a photo-album on the coffee table, of Aman and a beautiful woman dressed in her wedding finery.

"Who is this?" she asked.

"Who?"

She pulled the picture out from under the photo album and turned it to show Aman. He stood up from the armrest of the wing-back chair he was sitting on and sat down next to her on the sofa.

"This is me." He grinned.

" I know that...Who is this?" She said, a bit impatient with his constant jokes.

"Yes...This is Priya." He took the picture from her hand.

"Priya?" She asked, curious. She had never heard him talk about another woman before.

"Priya, my wife." Aman looked at her from the corner of his eye to gauge her reaction to his statement. He nearly changed his mind when he saw how much this information hurt her. He didn't want to hurt her but he didn't know how else he could re-direct her love. Loving him was going to hurt her in the long run. This would be a small hurt compared to that.

Naina hoped she didn't look like the idiot she felt she was . Not only did Aman not love her, he was married. How had she fallen in love with a married man?

Aman kept talking, hoping that at some point she would stop looking so shell-shocked. "She is the reason why Mom and I came to New York."

Naina hoped she could listen to this without bursting into tears, which is all she wanted to do at this moment. And maybe, stomp her feet.

Aman continued, " Unh...I am so silly, I didn't even tell you. I kept talking about everything except what is important."

Naina didn't care how silly he was, she just wanted this finished so she could go home and cry her eyes out. It was hard enough sitting there, next to him, pretending that the world hadn't just fallen away from under her feet. She forced herself to concentrate on his words instead of the huge hole in the vicinity of her heart.

"Priya and I were married three years ago. Everything was good until the honeymoon but then began the usual husband-wife squabbles. One day, I said too much. You know how I am. I can be a bit rude."

Thinking of some of the ways he had been rude to her, almost made her smile. But then the hurt came back and with it an uncharacteristic urge to hit something, preferably him.

Aman peeked at Naina again. She seemed to be getting herself under control, so he continued with his fake story.

"She got mad, left home and came here, to New York. Her parents live here. Mom and I followed her here, hoping to convince her to come back home. But she is still very angry with me. She says she needs more time. But I know that in the end everything will turn out fine. You know how it is. Isn't she pretty?"

Naina tried hard to control herself but his last question really brought home the unfairness of it all. The sheer irony of the question was not lost on her and she felt her tears overflowing her eyes and sliding down her cheeks.

He pretended to notice, for the first time, that she was crying. "Hey, why are you crying? Oh, god. All you women are the same. Don't worry. Everything will be fine. I'm telling you everything will be fine." He gently wiped away her tears with his index finger.

"May I go now?" She tried to make it sound nonchalant, uncaring but it came out as more of a whimper.

"Please stay, Priya...I mean, Naina." Aman deliberately used Priya's name for Naina but he really hated himself for doing it. "I'm feeling sad."

"So am I." she breathed. "I'm going.", came out more firmly. She grabbed her purse from the floor and the bouquet of roses Rohit had given her, and stood up.

Aman pretended not to notice her shaky steps as she almost ran for the front door.

"It's still raining outside, you'll get wet. Take this towel with you."

Naina continued walking towards the door. "Bye, Aman."

"Bye."

Scene 2

She almost reached her home when she realized that her mom would ask questions about tonight. The tears would be indistinguishable from the rain running down her face but how would she explain the bouquet of roses.

She turned around and headed back to Aman's Uncle's house. She started to knock but didn't want to face anyone. So she tested the door knob. It was not locked. She opened the door and peeked in to make sure no one was in the foyer. She was putting the bouquet on the table in the foyer when she heard voices.

She didn't know why but the voices were hypnotizing and she moved forward until she could hear them more clearly. The old adage about eavesdroppers not hearing anything favorable about themselves crossed her mind but she ignored it.

"You love her, don't you?" Aman's mother was saying. Naina almost fled, but like a masochist wanted to hear Aman say that he loved Priya.

"Who, Mom?" Aman took a sip of his tea. "It's not like that. I don't love Naina." Aman said almost forcefully, praying that if he said it enough times, he might believe it himself.

"I didn't say anything about Naina.", his mom said, smiling at the fierceness of his expression.

"I don't love her." He said it forcefully again, and crossed his fingers at the same time.

His mom came to him and took his fingers in her hand, and uncrossed them. "I'm your mother. You cannot lie to me."

"So, what should I do, Mom? Tell her the truth?" Aman left his mother and walked to the window. Naina couldn't see him anymore, but she heard the plantive sound of his next words. "When, after knowing everything, you don't have the courage to face the truth, then, how will Naina?"

Aman put his forehead on the window. The wind was blowing the rain onto the window. Everything was blurry. Very fitting, he thought. He turned to his mom. "What do I do, Mom? What do I say?"

Naina wished she could see his face. His voice sounded so sad, so hopeless. Not at all like the always cheerful Aman she knew. "How do I say that, for the first time in my life this heart has wanted someone, this heart has taken a breath for someone, this heart has loved someone?"

"How do I say, Naina, this heart loves you with all its strength but this heart itself is very weak?" Saying the words, even if only to his mother, made Aman feel like a weight had been lifted from his chest.

At his words, Naina nearly fell over from the shock. What was this?

Aman was still talking, "How do I give her this weak heart, Mom? How do I give her this weak heart?"

"How do I tell her that the girl in that picture is not my wife, that she is my friend, my doctor, who is fighting day and night to keep me alive a few more days."

Naina wasn't sure her heart could handle the shocks this conversation was giving her but she didn't move from her position.

"Damn it, Damn it." Aman was tired of hiding from the real issue. As starkly as possible, he said, "I'm dying, Mom."

His mom started shaking her head, saying, "That's not true. That's not true. Priya said that a transplant is possible." Naina too was shaking her head. Aman, dead. She couldn't envision it, didn't want to envision it.

"Mom, I know Naina. If I tell her that I love her too, then she will want to marry me. And when I die, she will never let herself love again."

Naina had heard enough It was bad enough that her dad had chosen to make the decision to commit suicide. But this was a question of her life, of her love. She was not going to let anyone else make decisions for her life, however much she loved him. She stomped into the living room and stood right in front of Aman.

"I love you, Aman, but from now on I am going to make my own decisions. I am sick and tired of the men in my life making my decisions for me. My father didn't even give me a chance to help him ease his burdens, but, suddenly and irrevocably, made a decison that has ruined all our lives. Now, you are making the decision to give me up, without even asking me, if I want to spend what is left of your life with you. Well, Mr. Mathur, I have made a decision - I am going to marry you. I am going to make sure that I use every advantage I have to make my decision a reality. Good day."

And, she walked out.

Aman didn't know whether to applaud her or cry. This was the reason why he loved her so much. Even with all the things she had faced in her life, she still had the courage to love, and to stand up for herself. He knew that he had lost. There was going to be no stopping her now.

Aman looked over to see his mom pretending to be invisible. He raised an eyebrow at her. She smiled at him, that smile of hers that always unnerved him. The smile that said that he had been caught and there was no escaping her punishment. Only this time he wasn't really sure it would be that much of a punishment, more like torture. Being around Naina when he hadn't known she loved him had been hard enough. But being around her with her actively pursuing him would be extremely hard on his self-control.


End file.
